It’s amazing how in a relationship we change and adapt to each other.  New Husband and I were talking last night (while loading the dishwasher) about the positive effects each of us has had on the other.  Inadvertently, he has influenced me into being more of a homebody than ever before (maybe by making our home so happy and appealing to be in) and I’ve influenced him to be more technologically inclined, and hopefully, a bit more tolerant of others choices.

We joked about how, if I had gone on to med school as I’d wanted to, how things would have changed and if we would have eventually met each other.  I told him, that if I had went to a bigger college in NYC, I’m sure I would have been completely a different person.  Our environment really shapes who we are and who we become.  This really shows me how critical it is for all of us to have our children in positive environments that adequately reflect the values we want them to have.  THAT would be why, even on the evening when I’m dead exhausted and already went running, and B comes up to me and really wants to go for a rollerblade before bed…I hesitate (but only for a millisecond) and go grab our skates and helmets.  I want her to choose exercise and a healthy lifestyle because it’s fun and not because of any of the plethora of reasons other people choose it.  I also go along with her plans to “make a difference” because those are the values I want to embody for her.

Embracing the changes in your life, creates the new you, the one that you haven’t even dreamt about yet.


The Anti-Procrastinator.


Yes, that’s me.  It’s probably my best and worst trait all wrapped into one.  If I know I’ve got something to do, I am not going to postpone-I’m going to do it right this very minute.

This could also be why I end up with my “free” time at 9 pm every night now.  I go downstairs, sit on the couch with NewHusband (who is not so new anymore, but it’s what you know him as) and reach behind me to the stand near the sofa and grab the glass of my favorite Argentina malbec he’s had “airing” for me while I tuck the princess in.  So although I don’t really go out dancing anymore, each night home is exactly what I look forward to every night.  I never, never thought that would be appealing.  Or that I would look forward to it so strongly.  But  I do.

As an aside, B wanted to have some recognition of Earth Day and we decided to start our own tradition.  We walked a mile around our development picking up trash on both sides of the street.  For a nice neighborhood, there sure were a lot of cigarette butts.  We took a pictoral representation of the results, I’ll load a few here.  And yes, my girl has some interesting clothes on…a plaid jacket, plaid skirt and argyle rain boots.  But for her, it just works.

10 GOOD things about a long commute.

So I’ll be back on the one-hour, one-way daily commute August 31st.  I’m so grateful to be getting out of teaching high school Chemistry and Physics that the commute will be a gift-at least for awhile.  But since I know that eventually it will be tough to tolerate the 2 hours daily out of my life (but I’m still home by 5 every day), I’m making a list to look back upon as a reminder.

Here are the positives about having an hour before and after work in my car.

10. Sometimes it’s really fun to stop at a little convenience store and get a yummy snack.  I don’t do it all that much, but when I do it’s a treat for the ride home.

9.Plenty of time to think about new blogging and writing concepts.

8. I get to walk in the doors of the building where I worked for 11 years and see the people who have supported me and been like family, since 2 years before my daughter was born.  I can’ t tell you how hard it was to leave and how much I’ve missed them.

7. My favorite hairdresser is in the town where I work.  Not to mention my gynocologist.  Much easier to get to those guys.  I need a good haircut.  No one is the same as my P.

6. I have plenty of time to mentally organize my life.

5.  It keeps me off FaceBook and email for at least two hours a day.  Well, sort of…I still receive messages from both on my BlackBerry.

4.  Coffee.  I get an extra cup on the ride in and get to listen to the news.  It’s lovely.

3.  It’s great thinking time.  I love to reminisce about my past and it’s a long enough time that I can have a good cry if I want and still be presentable by the time I arrive.  Sometimes I know I need a bawl session (I am so not a public crier, so this really helps to destress, I know it sounds nuts but having a place for it helps me keep myself together).

2.  Music.  Music.  Music.  This 5-10 minute commute has left me no time for one of my biggest loves-my iPod.  And NPR.  And current radio stations.  I can’t wait to listen to music again.  I really don’t have many other points in my day where it fits in.  Running is about it… and I don’t always run with music.

1. I will be going every day to a workplace I love instead of one I dread before I even set foot in the front doors, and working for a cause I believe in and a place I feel passionate about.  I won’t sell out again.

Bored, are we?

So, I’ve never really been bored. And honestly, I do have things to do. I really do. I just don’t want to do THOSE things. I’ve always been swamped single mama with several jobs, a house and a daughter to raise. Since the new marriage a little over a year ago, I’ve really had some adjusting to do. But I do have some help I didn’t have before. And B is 9 now…she needs me still, but differently. And not as often. We still spend more one-on-one time than most parents and their children, but it’s not as demanding as it was when she was little. All these things are good right? I know…they are supposed to be. BUT, I’m getting bored. I’m not used to this sort of life. And second of all, I think I really like being busy. I have hobbies, I have friends…it’s just still so new and odd. And I feel guilty when everyone says, “I am SOOOO busy, I just can’t stand how stressed I am”. Although I’m never really a stressed out kind of girl-but I am kinda bored.
It almost feels like my life has had all of it’s most exciting moments already. Has anyone else ever felt this way?

Break into Spring!

Our neighborhood is fabulous for a growing 9 year old girl!  We stayed home for spring break, since we usually travel during February break, when it’s just dreadful here in NY.  Spring break is sunny and smells good and fun for bike riding and rollerblading and yes…trampolining!  I love that we have little girls B’s age next door, but I hardly see her anymore!  It shows me what its going to be like as she gets older and has this “life of her own”.  I know its the point of parenting to raise independent children who make the right choices on their own, but does anyone else feel a bit sad too?  I don’t feel quite as needed.  I think B feels it too…she pops her head in periodically and yells, “Mom???  I LOVE you!”.  Here we go-the beginning of her taking care of me.